Not all marriages are made in heaven. A marriage to be happy requires a considerable amount of work on the part of both partners. There are many couples who get stuck in their miserable and unhappy marriages for various reasons. While there are people who divorce even if there is a chance of saving the marriage because it is the easy way out, many couples tend to stick with their marriages even if they are miserable and unhappy with their relationship. The top 10 wrong reasons to stay married are given.
1) Staying married for children: Many couples are forced to stay married even if they are in a loveless marriage because they think that a divorce can negatively affect the children and that 2 parents is better than one. Even if they have stopped loving their spouse, most parents prefer to suffer and not part, since they love their children and would not like to cause them any harm. But what they forget is that their frequent fights, behavior with each other, and other indifferences can affect the children as well. Just because you have kids doesn’t mean you have to suffer miserably in a relationship you don’t want to be in. Also, by staying together in an unhappy marriage, you are teaching your children that when they get married, even if things go wrong, they should not get divorced and would rather suffer in the relationship. Think again, is that the example you want to set for your children?
2) Staying married for financial security: Money is a great motivator when it comes to staying in miserable marriages. Most women tend to stay in such marriages because of the comforts and benefits they get in their husbands’ house. The same applies to a man who survives mainly on the income of his wife. But one thing they forget is that no amount of money can buy love or happiness. Staying together for money is one of the stupidest things anyone can do!
3) Staying married through guilt: Many men and women stay in a marriage because they feel guilty about ruining the other person’s life, especially in love marriages. Even if they have stopped loving their spouse or have fallen in love with someone else, they prefer not to let their spouse know by staying married. What they forget is that they are cheating and only upsetting themselves and doing their spouses a disservice by keeping them in a relationship with someone who no longer loves them.
4) Staying married to show that your choice was correct: This happens mostly with couples who have opted for love marriages against their parents’ wishes. When the going gets tough, they keep the pretense of a happy marriage in front of others to show that their choice was not wrong and that they are happy with their choices. What they are forgetting is that they are only causing themselves more pain by doing so.
5) Staying married to honor the vows: Many couples remain in unhappy marriages because they are led to believe that marriage is forever. It would not be wrong to say that there are many who stay glued to their marriages because of the wedding vows that marriage is a lifetime commitment and they are married for better or worse. Staying with someone you don’t want to be with because your religion or community expects it of you would only put you in more pain and grief.
6) Staying married due to low self-esteem and loneliness: Many times low self-esteem can prevent people from making the right decisions. You can’t blame them because they don’t know their worth and don’t realize they can do better. Many men and women with low self-esteem even lose hope of ever being happy, especially women who tend to find emotional security in their marriages. Even when the marriage shows signs of an unhappy marriage, there are many people who do not opt out because they feel lonely and have no parents or friends to turn to. They find security in their marriage and would not want to leave their comfort zone, even if they are not happy.
7) Staying Married Because They Don’t Want To Be Like Their Parents: Many children who have suffered the effects of parental divorce remain stuck in their marriages because they do not want their children to suffer like them or they want to be like their own parents.
8) They have been forced to stay together: Many times couples are forced to stay together in marriage due to the pressures of society and the pressures of family or relatives who are more concerned with their reputation than with the feelings of the couples who feel miserable and suffer the effects of an unhappy marriage Remember that it is you who is suffering and you have the right to rectify the condition.
9) Staying married for property or property: Often times, the couple would have built houses together, bought property, or built businesses together that they are both attached to and would not want to give up for any reason.
10) Staying married is less expensive: Some men feel that staying married is less expensive than getting divorced, especially if they have to pay large alimony to opt out.
I feel like all of the above reasons are bad enough. Personally, I have seen some of my friends who got divorced from their miserable first marriages find very content and happy second marriages. So if you are in a marriage for the wrong reasons, think again. Is it really worth being in an unhappy marriage?
