In my previous article, I discussed why fighting back is the biggest mistake you can make when defending yourself.
The fight is confused with self-defense.
Defending is not the same as fighting back!
The prevailing attitude is that you must fight to protect yourself even though the playing field is not level. Your attacker is likely to be bigger, stronger, or more aggressive. The reality is that fighting a bigger or stronger attacker has little to no chance of success.
Imagine an image of Yin and Yang.
Yang (white) represents the masculine characteristics of strength and aggressiveness.
Yin (black) represents feminine qualities of softness and passivity.
Fighting is Yang.
Fighting a bigger attacker positions you as the little black dot in a sea of white. The odds of you winning here are not good.
In ‘The Art of War’, one of the principles is to not let your enemy choose the battlefield. If you follow this advice and change the battlefield to Yin’s arena, magic happens. The sea of white is now a dot of white in a sea of black.
The table has changed. Winning is a foregone conclusion if you have the right tools.
The key to winning against a stronger attacker
Clearly, the key is to change the battlefield from one where you don’t stand a chance to one where your attacker’s superiorities are negated.
Fighting back puts you in the Yang domain, where the odds are stacked against you.
Word association is very powerful. The moment you think of the word “fight,” it puts you in the mindset of fighting. You associate it with violence.
Fighting requires aggression and strength. Images of kicks and punches appear.
If you are a placid person, all your aggressiveness and strength will not be up to a stronger attacker. Fight all you want, but it won’t detract from the fact that you’re still a little black dot in the sea of white.
The opposite of counterattacking is countering intelligently, which is Yin mastery. His strength and aggressiveness are negated because you’re not using any here.
Smoothness is the key. With softness comes relaxation that gives you the calm to face the situation.
How to deny your superiority
In theory everything works. But how do you change the battlefield in real life?
Take a simple example; when an attacker grabs you from behind in a bear hug.
Conventional wisdom teaches you to fight. You fight with all your might to let go. You kick him in the shin, slam your head into his face.
Fighting means operating in the Yang domain. The odds are against you.
To change the battlefield you must not fight. Do the opposite, relax your body totally. There is no indication of any fight. Turn your head toward him and whisper an offer he can’t refuse as you slide one of your hands back and begin stroking him. When you have a good firm grip, just hold tight and pull.
Watch him drop you faster than a hot potato!
This is the art of fighting without fighting.
This is the secret to how to level the playing field when you are disadvantaged by size, strength, and aggression.
In the next post, I’ll cover why we often fall into the trap of fighting back.
