Customer Service Representatives (CSRs) exist in every industry, business, and profession. Some are lawyers, some are advertising executives, some are publishers, and some work in call centers. What they have in common is the need to manage their internal and external “customers” with exceptional customer service. The traditional customer is the stranger who buys a product or service. The non-traditional client is equally important. This could be your coworker, a colleague from another department, or the IT consultant helping you with the software.
How does assertiveness play an important role? Understanding the true meaning and intent behind assertiveness can help anyone deal with challenges with coworkers, vendors, senior managers, or customers. That intention is to communicate with self-respect and respect for others. This is crucial when we find ourselves in difficult situations: For example, having to: say “no”; express disagreement or dissatisfaction; follow up on broken promises; or set limits. In all areas of business, there will be times when we need to agree to disagree. However, keeping the relationship intact should always be the main goal. After all, we have to keep working with these colleagues, managers, vendors, and we need to retain the customer.
Learning assertive communication strategies directly helps with these confrontations. Assertiveness gives us permission to defend ourselves. It teaches us what to say and how to say it. We can learn to set limits when others cross the line. We communicate in a way that encourages others to take us more seriously. The goal is to communicate disagreement or dissatisfaction in a way that does not alienate others.
In any customer service interaction, when deadlines are tight, the stakes are high and diplomacy is essential, we must be respectful and communicate with authority. Saying “no” is difficult for many of us. Many people want to avoid the conflict or pushback that often follows when we decline a request. It’s better if people take us seriously the first time.
learning tip: When you say “no”, keep a neutral tone of voice, free from anger, frustration or sarcasm. Repeat the request to reassure the other person that they understand the question. Briefly let them know why you should decline. Then use the actual word “no” in your last statement.
“I realize the deadline is tight and you want that report today. To get it done right, I need to get input from other people, which means more turnaround time. So, No, I can’t finish that report for this afternoon. Let’s look at another alternative.”
Following up on broken promises or missed deadlines is another awkward situation for many CSRs. How do we confront our internal or external customers without distancing ourselves from them? Assertiveness training suggests stating the verbal agreement, as you understand it, followed by an open-ended question. This is a respectful way to confront someone. It gives them a chance to speak for themselves and explain what factors caused the deal to break. This approach is more respectful than accusation. Give the other person the benefit of the doubt and work out a joint solution.
learning tip: When you want to confront someone who has broken a commitment or promise, state the verbal agreement, as you understood it. So ask a question.
“I understood that we agreed that you would reply to me on Monday. Today is Wednesday and I never heard from you again. What happened? Where do we go from here?”
Setting limits is about teaching others how we expect them to treat us. If we hear a lot of complaints about things gone wrong and the call turns ugly, it’s important to stand up for ourselves. If someone crosses the line and starts using obscene language, we have the right to let them know how we expect to be treated.
learning tip: When a caller starts using, let them complete their conversation, no matter how long it takes. It is important to address the abuse rather than the problem at hand.
“I want to help you with your problem and I will not continue this conversation if you continue to bother me. May I have your promise to speak respectfully? Now, let’s move forward with solutions that will help you.”
Assertiveness is a learned skill. Customer service representatives, in any work situation, benefit from learning the values, beliefs, and strategies that accompany an assertive approach to communication. Over the past 15 years that I have used and taught this methodology, I have seen many business people improve their customer relationships, enhance their professionalism, and reduce their personal stress by taking an assertive approach to customer service.
