Looking at the title above, many people may not be able to think of anything worse than failure right away… except maybe, death. If you think about it for a while, other thoughts may come to your mind.
For me, this is a deep topic when it comes to living up to your potential because I know that the fear of failure is quite common. Many people do not act because they are afraid of failing…or are they?
It’s been my experience, more often than not, that a lot of people aren’t necessarily afraid of failing per se, but they really are afraid of the perceived stigma of failure. In other words, they fear the perceived social backlash to failure. They don’t want the world to stare back at them with disapproval or disappointment; they want to be accepted. This perception drives the motivation to stay put because the perception is that if you sit still and do nothing, you will not fail. However, the other part that comes with sitting still is that doing nothing also produces nothing, except the status quo.
Fear of failure causes many people to fight hard to maintain the status quo. They believe that as long as nothing changes, they have nothing to fear. It’s easier to go with the current than to swim against it: no one wants to be a salmon. The problem with this position is that even if you are afraid of change, change is still happening all around you constantly and sooner or later you will have to move or get run over. Greatness has never been achieved without the will to be a salmon, without the courage to look at the masses and do otherwise.
In fact, the history of the greatness of the world is based on many failures. The power of failure lies within the lesson. Did you learn anything from your failure and how will you apply what it taught you next time? You see, your failures only remain if you lose the lesson that lies within, and without a doubt, there is always a lesson or two that you need to learn in order to achieve success.
Remember that Christopher Columbus was searching the Far East when he came across the Caribbean Islands and what is now the United States of America. What absolute error in direction was that? However, that failure led to the greatness of Christopher Columbus. He never found the coast of China; however, he passionately pursued his dream and changed the history of marine exploration forever. He inspired many other explorers through his perseverance and courage.
Another example is Sir Alexander Flemings’ accidental discovery of penicillin, which came after many failed attempts to find an antiseptic to treat war wounds that would not endanger patients. Dr. Fleming believed that there had to be a better way to treat soldiers’ injuries without them succumbing to death in the process. Although he was looking for a better antiseptic, he discovered something better: the first antibiotic that revolutionized medicine and the way we treat wounds.
Both great men in search of a dream, something they believed in and we wouldn’t know their names today if they hadn’t taken action.
The point is that there is absolutely nothing wrong with failing as long as you learn from it. In fact, failure is imperative to success and I don’t think you can achieve much success if you have never failed at anything. Personally, I have failed many more times than I have succeeded; however, I have always tried my best to grasp the lesson and apply it next time. It may take several tries, but what the heck; the fun is in the pursuit of greatness anyway.
So what’s worse than failure?
Inaction is much worse than failure… in fact, inaction is much worse than anything else you can think of. Just imagine what life is like for a paraplegic, and then multiply that by 10,000. They are unable to do much to help themselves. How agonizing do you imagine that to be? Now, if you are a capable person and you choose inaction, what does that make you? It may sound harsh, but I think you’ll agree that it makes you a worthless lump. That is, of course, if you want to achieve success, if you are in search of greatness. If not, be my guest and enjoy the status quo.
I am still baffled (and saddened) by the number of people I talk to on a daily basis who refuse to act out of fear. These are not weak-minded individuals either; these are well educated and intelligent individuals. The point is that the fear of failure paralyzes you. When you let fear guide you, you will always be unable to act. That is why true leadership requires courage because you have to act especially in the face of fear.
I have talked to, counseled, and counseled many people who refuse to pursue their dreams and goals because they fear the stigma of failing. This happens even when all the tools and resources are available. What I often hear is a plethora of excuses and justifications for why the time is not right to act. My answer is always the same “If not now, when?”
When is the right time to act?
This question has a very simple answer; however, many people try to rationalize why they don’t act instead of admitting their fear. The right time to act is always when you are ready to act, not a minute before and not a minute after. Your disposition will depend on your independent thought; what you believe in and what you want to achieve. Only you can answer these questions and thus determine your readiness to act.
The action does not require external stimuli before it happens, that is reaction. What you need is pro-action, which requires your readiness and willingness to act because you believe in something. It doesn’t matter what state the world is in or how your finances are; if you believe in something and have a true desire to achieve it, the only thing left to do is act.
If you choose inaction, nothing will happen. Anything you believe in and anything you desire will remain just a fantasy, all because you didn’t act. Your circumstances have nothing to do with the result; your decision not to act does.
On the other hand, what if you choose to act on your beliefs, to go after your desires? Something is guaranteed to happen if you choose to act. Sure, the result may very well be failure and you may not reach your goals this time; however, think of all that you will have learned. Also, how much fun will you have had exercising your freedom to choose to follow your dream? This, in my opinion, is priceless. Through the many failures I’ve had, I don’t regret any part of the experiences…they were fun and I learned a lot too.
Let me share a scenario of how one small act can make a big difference.
He was on the subway one morning in New York City when an unstable man got on the train yelling and yelling at another passenger. He threatened to stab her in the head multiple times, and when she ignored him, he became even angrier. At that point, the man began making lewd gestures towards other passengers and threatened to stab them as well. As she looked around the room, I could see how tense everyone was, most ignoring the man and trying not to look in her direction. My impulse was to do the same because, let’s face it, the man was scary.
Even though I was feeling a ping in my gut, I felt like I had to do something. I believed that what this man was doing was not only wrong but very dangerous. I thought to myself, “What if my daughters were on this train? Wouldn’t I want someone to do something? Wouldn’t I like to think that I raised them with good character principles that would force them to do something?” With that thought in mind and the ping in my gut, I decided to act.
Now don’t let your imagination run wild, I’m not Jet Li. As much as I replayed the scene in my head where I took this guy down in 2 moves and subdued him without harming him or anyone else, it doesn’t. played… no movie heroism on my part. I told you he was scared…just as scared as any of the other passengers but he wasn’t going to let my fear paralyze me; I couldn’t let it stop me from acting on something I believed in.
So instead of cinematic heroics, I took the path of least resistance. Being a huge Law & Order fan, I took note of the man’s features and what he wore, right down to the dirty Nike sneakers with the 2 marks on the back of the right heel and the gray jacket with the rotator cuff tear. . Then I got off the train at the next stop and quickly ran to the station employee in the booth and got his attention. I explained the situation with a detailed description of the man and she reported it to the police officers at the next 2 stops from the station.
Now, while there were no heroics in the movie, the police pulled the man off the train 2 stops from where I got off and the threat was no more. Can you imagine the relief of those passengers? I know he would be relieved if he was on that train.
Now imagine if I or someone else did nothing. The situation could have gone many other ways, many of them unpleasant. This man could have easily lost it and lashed out at the passengers and then you’d just see the news headline that an insane man went on a rampage and stabbed multiple people to death on a New York City subway, killing two and injuring nine.
The point of telling you this story is not to paint me as a white knight. It’s just to illustrate what a significant difference a simple act can make when you believe in something. I just acted because I thought it was the right thing to do. I wouldn’t have been able to sleep well knowing I didn’t do anything when I know I could have done something, especially if I had to read a horrible headline like the scenario I described above. I don’t think that would sit well with you either.
I know I’m hitting you over the head with this, but if you’ve read the article up to this point, I think you now understand why. The biggest failure is lack of action. If you believe in something, if you have a dream and you don’t act, you have suffered the greatest failure and it will continue to be so as long as you choose to do nothing.
In case you haven’t figured it out yet… I’ll explain it this way. Failure is a choice and so is success. That’s why when you try and fail, you can choose to try again. Choosing to try means that you have chosen to accept the possibility of failure. Learning the lessons of your failure and choosing to try again so that you can apply those lessons means that you have made the decision to succeed. It all depends on you… your choice.
Action in the face of fear is true courage.
