When I was in high school, I was a wrestler. Our coach had us memorize a sequence of moves based on what our opponent could do. And then practice them relentlessly. That way, they would be etched into our memory during a match, so that we could respond instead of thinking.
The most important we practiced was the first, as it set the tone for the match.
Some people try to apply this to seduction, but you will quickly discover that she can invent many more moves than a wrestler. Some kids memorize hundreds of opening themes, patterns, and other conversation starters. But there is a simpler way. Let’s first see why memorized patterns, at least for openers, don’t work as well.
Suppose you’ve heard that “line” before? If you’ve read “The Game,” you know that shortly after Project Hollywood was up, every night hordes of guys descended on the clubs, all spitting out the same things. It works great for the first group of guys, but not for everyone who comes after.
Another drawback is that if you are nervous in the least, they will go wrong. This will put you on the defensive before he opens his mouth.
Then what do you do? Rhythm statements.
These are statements that she simply cannot disagree with. Things that are absolutely true. Usually things about the environment. It has to be something interesting, but not too much. You’re not trying to be witty or show off your crazy skills, at least not at the moment.
The goal of an opening is for the conversation to begin as smoothly and as comfortably as possible for both parties. Once it flows, they can feel each other and find out if there is enough chemistry.
The best way to follow the rhythm statement is a question of etiquette. Let’s say your rhythm statement is that the band is really interesting. After adding a tag question it would sound like this:
“This is an interesting band, isn’t it?”
It sounds sword, I know. But the point of this is to slide their thoughts from wherever they were into a conversation like yours. Don’t interrupt like a gangbusters trying to create a massive attraction in the first two seconds.
Another mistake is looking at her as if you need some kind of reward for starting a conversation. Once she agrees, and your spider sense tells you it’s an honest agreement, you better keep talking.
Share her opinion, ask her, and keep the conversation going.